As of this morning, vodka still has the other side of my BFF necklace. She treats me right.
I just pooped in his toilet and didn't flush...I desperately need to get him past the girls don't poop phase.
I just saw a kid walk into class with his dad. Fuck his life.
thought a girl was checking me out today. took me like 5 minutes to realize it was a mannequin
I AM AT THE LOUNGE WHERE THEY FILMED THE LAP DANCE IN SHOWGIRLS....IT IS AMAZING
alll i remember is comming back downstairs, his pants were off and he was aplauding me
We went the strip club and out of no where the waitress brings him over a quesadilla and a jäger bomb and says your usual!! He swore he had never been there before
My dad found my bra hanging from my rear view mirror. Happy long weekend.
Last nights hook up turn into a star wars history lesson.. He's luck y he's pretty..
I wonder how drunk we can get before Christmas Caroling turns into trespassing.
I'm sorry for what I said when I was orgasming
I need to go home for the safety of everyone in a 10 mile radius, especially me
bonus check + party bus = big hot mess
I've had way too many dicks in my mouth the past two weeks. Ready to go back to school and be a doctor now
Its like a glacier coming out of my asshole.
Randomize
