2 v-cards in one night. impossible is nothing.
he took off my shirt and said 'oh my god the legends are true'
he kept a regular condom in his wallet just so he could comment on how it wouldnt fit before whipping out the magnums. i give him points for the build up
I NEED TO NOT REMEMBER THIS IN THE MORNING. He is our TEACHER.
The fact that I woke up with my panties on the counter and a piece of pizza stuck in my sheets is what scares me.
I think I just found part of a tooth on my bed... What goes on in here?
THEY ARE MY AGE. THEY ARE YOUR LITTLE SISTER'S AGE THIS IS A DELICATE MATTER. CAPS LOCK
Omg. I'm making you a chocolate and "herb" birthday cake and using joints for candles. I'm gunna need moms help with this!
I may or may not have definitely said the words "how do I put this beer in my purse without looking like an alcoholic" last night.
This is what we get for finishing a whole box of Franzia by ourselves
This is me trying to take a picture to send to grandma. At 4. We were trying to look sober.
sorry I called you to cry about the state of the neopets economy
are you still alive?
no.
i'll cry at your funeral. and leave a burrito by your tombstone
Also we're getting drunk and sledding down Caroline street. See you soon.
I woke up in a boat, with a life jacket on, tons of beer cans and no lake... I was inside a garage. WTF
Randomize
