Vanillla milkshakes are the new Gold Bond. Will explain later.
Is my tampon string too long for this dress?
at first I thought it was funny, but looking at it now, it screams "dramatic" and "medicated wipes."
do you think semen can infect my impacted wisdom tooth
I think he's having people over to watch him get way too drunk again
wait, how does the 20 year old one night stand pregnant girl have a superiority complex?
Looking forward to meeting the person naked and passed out at my kitchen table.
She was touching herself and looking a shoes online. My debt is bad enough without bringing that hot mess into my life.
The most humiliating part was that I farted while he was tasing me.
OMG THE KID WHO TRIED TO MAKE OUT AT THE BAR WITH ME IS SITTIG NEXT TO ME IN THE AIRPORT. WHY LIFE WHY???
I found out his moms name, maiden name, profession, and office location, his dads name and profession, his home phone, picture of their house, all of his work profiles, and the cost of their house. All I'm trying to do is find his damn twitter
I don't question myself. That's what I have you for.
I'm honored.
I witness him finger a girl behind the dj decks yet I'm still going to meet up with him. Wtf is my life
Well, I sent nudes with an Elmo t shirt on the floor... so there's that.
Also, two points for knowing me well enough to know I definitely would put the moves on his brother.
Randomize
