I told her I was pledging and she immediately proposed to give me head in the bathroom. i love how easy rushees are
Do you think there are girls out there that really do like small penis?
9 beers later and she still looks like Gary Busey.
I just found out my first birthday was a keg party. Suddenly everything makes sense
found a naked boy completely buried under a pile of her clothes and terrified...she says she was "saving him for later"
it appears as though my vagina has gotten the best of me again
You were doing downward dog and puking off my deck at the same time.
how do you say happy birthday to the guy that almost got you pregnant? i cant just write the same thing as last year.
Walking in to my alcoholic Assessment meeting with a black eye = 40% awkward 60% awesome
I call it a party but only because that sounds better than 8 people getting drunk around a pool.
I hope you have a dream of a sloth with my face touching you erotically
All I am going to say is this: I woke up with lots of bruises on my knees from running around on all fours being a 'dinosaur'. Either girls night in went terribly wrong or terribly right.
Nothing like the soothing screaming of your neighbor getting boned while eating a pizza on the front porch.
Hi please disregard the last text and if you'd like our entire interaction
Done
He doesn't have an existential crisis after we have really violent sex now which is nice
Randomize
