he asked me what things i liked that he did in bed, and i told him all the things i hated so he would use it on that new bitch and she wouldnt hook up with him anymore.
you for real need to get over him dude
What did you even date her?
because emotionally unstable girls are great in bed.
it was better than the time i puked and I forgot to open the lid of the toilet
she had that "i just got used" look on her face when i kicked her out at 5am
Found your pants. They were stuffed in the tank of the toilet.
Watching her eat just hurts me
But mostly fuck him senseless. Render him speechless. Have him look at my vagina and wonder, "WHAT SORCERY IS THIS?!"
"you can only have my number if you answer all the questions on this trivial pursuit card correctly"
words I never want to hear dad say again: "Trevor you sexy man you"
2013: the year of legs covered in hair and pregnancy scares.
Just found out I made out with the 40 year old Captain of the boat at the barge party. On the bright side he let me drive the boat so at least there's that.
Dude, you need better judgement.Trust me I know. I put my dick in the wrong mouths all the time
He's got the good dick trifecta - flip phone, works outside, bed with no headboard.
Nothing says depression like laying in your bed stoned, naked, and eating a cupcake
Straight up last night my mom was like josh you need to find a job that doesn't include the selling or transporting of drugs
Randomize
