she texted him the burrito order while she was puking in the Del Taco parking lot...
He sat on a barstool and did the robot for 3 hours - I'm pretty sure he enjoyed himself.
I wasn't sure if "you're even prettier in the dark" was a compliment. Hmm.
Im still in bed and cant move and i only had Two beers and a shot last night... how did I make it in college?
God gave us a 4 year grace period.
we made out at a charity event. really i was helping the fight against aids...
Going to the beach. Greeting Sandy with a blunt. Wish us luck!
His legs actually look hot in that dress. He might even make a better girl than Josh
I need to be more functional. That doesn't mean I'm going to drink less, I just need to wake up and shit
Just had a VERY VIVID visualization of wrapping a pizza around my cock and fucking its brains out. Soooooo less weed more dates?
I found him in the kitchen singing German metal into a banana while simultaneously mixing brownie batter. He didn't have any pants on.
I don't know. I'm drunk and dressed as a pirate but ill do the math tomorrow morning.
why is "bang the student affairs grad assistant" the third highest thing on your semester goals list
Also, I just opened Google to find the lyrics to California Gurls. Karaoke night did us dirty.
So I was having a really bad night...so I decided to steal a pumpkin.
Who did he bring home?
Idk. But did you see her shoe choice by the stairs, I'm really not expecting anything great.
Randomize
