I have big tits. Rules don't apply to me.
we couldn't afford a big pool so we bought 2 kiddie pools and put the inflatable beer pong table inbetween. get over here. now.
Doing shrooms is fine until you get raped by curtains
She keeps telling me I can't keep feeding the dog my food. I gave half the weed brownie to the dog and half to me. I just want it to taste the greatness of cheezits like I am.
I really hope you are not drunk feeding a raccoon.
I opened my eyes this morning, looked at the sunlight and made this hangover my bitch.
Lets just say that a certain piercing set off certain alarms when I went thru the airport detector/scanner thingie. David was high fived like 12 times.
your vagina must have magic restorative powers I feel rested and powerful this morning.
He snapchatted me his dick and he's circumcised....BRB going to hug his Mom
Did I mention I hooked up with another country star? I think I need some sort of trophy for each time, yah know? Or like a sash and I win a badge or patch for each person. Like a slutty Girl Scout.
I had a dream he was standing in front of me naked and flexing while yelling VICTORY and gizzing all over the floor.
Explain why there's a meatball in my bong
He also reminds me slightly of a pirate which i find strangely attractive
I should get an "I gave blood today" type of sticker, but instead it would say "I went balls deep today"
There’s nothing that says motivation more than watching these little geniuses on Kids Baking Championship New Year’s Day. I’m ready to fuck shit up this year.
Randomize
