Hey man sorry I got all grabby
he quoted Bring It On. It's over.
You yelled "bananas are an excellent source of pottasium!"4 times in the middle of class. how do you not remember?
I don't even know what potassium is.
tolerance is too high. going on a liquor strike. ghandi style.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just banged that chick from the bar by speaking french. all i had to do was recite my grocery list
I'm also glad were at the point in our friendship where my vagina talking to you isn't weird
The bouncer at this strip club is my new best friend. He is also very persuasive. He got me to strip onstage for a t shirt. It's a nice shirt.
Every man needs a table where they can sit and reflect on the successful penile conquests of the day.
You took my underwater blowjob virginity.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We laughed. We cried. We came everywhere.
I know more about this girls vagina than I know about her personality
You ran through a field yelling "I'm frolicking! I'm frolicking!" Then fell on your face. How is your nose today, doll?
Opened my notebook to coke all over the pages. So, if that's any indication on how this weekend went.
Long fucking story. But hey I got an orgasm and breakfast so I'm winning.
the girls would appreciate it if you invited over some drunk, single, straight men with low standards.
Randomize