i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
let's just say, the carpet matched the drapes. in colour and length.
Hahaha. I am actually really tight for having a kid. Like really really tight.
Are you pooping in the stall next to me?
Maybe....
Cause I just heard a fart and it sounded like one of your farts.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Oh my god, I hid a wine bottle in my boot.
We lit firecrackers from NYE in the fireplace and he was so passed out that he slept through it.
I definitely hasselhoffed a taco bell burrito on my kitchen floor in front of my dad and little brother.
All I need right now is some mouthwash, dignity, and security camera footage...
don't trust your eyes. just sniff them. if they smell like axe, they are broke, move on to the next.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How is it that I've hooked up with not one but two guys in the children's section of a bookstore tonight?
I feel so nauseous and all I want is string cheese. My life never makes sense.
We have an albino peacock in our apartment. It's beautiful.
Scratch it being beautiful, bitch just stole my McDonalds. Call animal control.
He's got a british accent, a tounge ring, and he's wearing an eye patch... Of corse I'm fucking him
If you can endure a laser on the butthole, you can endure a wax on the butthole. Those are words to live by.
He howled at the moon then told me that if i were a dog he'd have sex with me...either i look like that girl or i need to stop going on blind dates. Period.
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