We walked 2 miles, legit 2 miles, and purchased 7 half gallons. One for each of us. Intense
Please tell me I didn't pass out while we were having sex last night... and if so I am sooooo sorry.
so i had a choice between studying for my physics test on fluid dynamics or spend the night with my girlfriend. hello doubletasking.
Dude I just figured out the mystery flavor of airhead is vodka sprite, no way i'm wrong
oh well at that point I was already depressed with life because I had watched the bratz movie.
He asked if I was on the pill, apparently I just downed my glass of beer and winked at him...
One of my students in my 8am class brought me a Tim Hortons cup with a bloody Mary in it. Clearly, I didn't manage to look not drunk when I ran into him at Denny's at 4am. Who decided to let me teach?
Just drove past the dude that came in your sock
My Wonder Woman lingerie has been defiled by man. I'm a horrible Amazon.
i warned you not to do dabs 20 minutes before graduation. You never listen
I cant go through life without knowing what ginger pubes actually look like
She looked so much better when u didn't look at her and the music was too loud to hear her
I just got woken up by that guy wearing a Krispy Kreme hat giving out donuts
Naptime over. I've got fresh contacts and tequila. RAAAAAAGE!
I woke up with an eye patch on, someone else's sweatshirt on, and no pants on. I hope it was a good night.
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