I understand. Hypothetically what should one do after throwing up in the shower?
We had to put his head at the bottom of the driveway so the puke would run down. Now he's sleeping outside.
Changed it back. Somehow I didn't think my profile pic should be me shirtless on ecstasy, ya know?
I think he's on the stoner protein diet. I just saw him, at 3 am, spreading mayo on a slice of deli ham and sprinkling salt on top.
i've never seen someone face fit so perfectly in a toilet bowl
i told my boss i want to eat her tits. 90 percent sure i'm getting fired
I've only left my bed to pee and eat nutella out of the jar with my fingers
Uh oh I Hage to dance yes, my feet are Whitney Houston
I just got a msg from someone saved in my phone as "gouiys stAndingg nezxt me not oz". Omh my life.
Well, when he's back from China he's probably gonna be pissed I used the spare key he gave me to prove to everyone I'm fucking an NBA player. We took all his booze too.
There were two girls and a guy on a bed and now i can put porn director on my resume.
Today is going to be the longest game of "was that a fart, or do I need to go wipe?" I have ever played. Maybe the most challenging too.
She was on top, but I lost her at "alright, you look like predator."
if you were broke and planning on using koolaid as a tequila chaser which flavor would you pick?
I woke up using a beer can as a pillow. successful party?
Randomize
