I figured girls wouldn't be down to sleep w/ a guy who plugged a pregnant chick
i just sat down and hooked up with this girl. after she left i called over another girl and did the same. this happened about four more times and i never left my chair
there is something about beer and popsicles that make the world go round
The silhouette of his dick looked like an eagle. Amurrican.
This guy on the bus keeps leaning over and sniffing my hair.
I won't be able to get a boner for a month
Challenge accepted.
Dude he did say "let's go cougar hunting" and you KNEW your mom was going out last night...so it's kind of your own fault for not coming
No gifts needed, but if you have fireworks or weed that'd be good.
11% beer and firearms, what could possibly go wrong?
I'm a dude in a dress, who came to a party with Holly GoLightly, got hit on by Bambi's mom, and wants to do terrible things to Link. Halloween is weird
WINE AND FILM. TALK ABOUT AN UPGRADE FROM NETFLIX AND CHILL.
I got my period on eclipse day. I'm officially in line with the moon.
I consider walking to the bars and dancing my exercise and I buy doubles so my drinks r heavier so that's my arm workout
I. Am. Not. Tattooing. My. Penis.
We made a blanket fort in my dorm room and fucked in it. Twice. I'm in love.
Randomize
