Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
And I just threw up at the table during Mother's Day Brunch.
based on who turned up here tonight the whole evening should just be called "mistakes i made when i was fat"
I'm a terrible person. There are two guys speaking sign language on the metro platform and at first I thought they were drunk and doing a silly dance.
My roommate found me crawling down the hallway as she was on her way to her morning class. Its time for a new semester.
my life has come down to walking through campus and wondering if every guy is the random i made out with saturday
My goal for tonight: make tomorrow as awkward as humanly possible.
just gave another girl i passed on the walk of shame a high five
I'll be accepting presents in the forms of drinks, drugs, and orgasms. So any or all of those will be fine.
that's the second time I've left that bar and slept with the person that's driven my car. thank god I don't take cabs..
Okay, tomorrow we'll have a day of life-sorting and plasma-selling.
Too bad I can't un-pee in his body wash
I like to be the stable force in your otherwise chaotic existence.
i could only love him more if he was covered in glitter.
What happened last night?
Lets just say you asked me a couple times if you had eyeballs..
Randomize
