What do you do when the person in the stall next to you says they're jealous?
We learned about herpes today in bio. I might as well have given the lecture
nyquil sex gave me 6 orgasms so I support that
He was probably pissed, but i couldn't tell for sure. How pissed can someone really look while holding a fishbowl mimosa?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have minimal recognition and a lot of burns on my tongue and my vagina hurts.
well i did drunkenly flip his snowmobile going 90, so i can kind of see why hes mad
I finally looked at the pictures from last night thanks for feeding me and pulling my pants up
The stoned girl at the dining hall just handed me a single chicken wing and insisted that she's "unable to procure more rations"
I want you inside of me and on top of me and under me and behind me
Basically I need you to be like god, just fucking everywhere
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Last night you told me to stop being Martha Stewart and asked if I had Taco Bell in my house
The squirrels are partying on my roof again. Now they're just rubbing it in that I'm home alone on a Saturday night and they're having orgies.
drunk and crying about Shakespeare- how's your night?
We didn't get home until 4 am. Her mom let us in, confessed that she had sex with someone she worked with and said he had a small penis. I love this family.
its 2pm and were already starting beer pong...its gonna be a good night
This whole brainwashing thing is easy!
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