Boobs. All I remember is boobs.
last night was fun... but i spent all morning tring to get the candle wax out of my chest hair. We did use candles last night?
halloween makes it hard to decipher real cops... from sexy men dressed up as them.
sorry I didn't call you. I had your number saved as "girl that offered bj but didn't follow thru".
Some kid in my class just puked in his backpack, zipped up the backpack, put the backpack on and walked out the door.
Two grown ass men just come into the bar riding humongous tricyles
I just found cold cuts in the blender. You and beefeater can no longer have unsupervised parties.
If court goes my way we are flying to Vegas.
Looked like a bag of smashed assholes and smelt like a brewery - still got morning sex. Marriage rules sometimes!
no, you don't understand how much people deal here. All I had to say was "hey lets buy a bag" and he pulled over instantly, then the randoms in the car behind us pulled over and sold us a bag.
I bought a vibrating wall dildo with my tax return. You?
Nothing says "we're never gonna bone" like "nice haircut, it makes you look like my cousin"
Thank you for listening to my rant about tacos.
I think I heard my penis growl. Wanna do lunch?
She's got a shotglass necklace, running down the street asking people to "fill her up". Get here.
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