is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
Why do my orgasm prompt her to begin using babytalk EVERYTIME?!
he said he wished he had more hands so he could firmly hold my boobs.
Just threw up off a chairlift. my life is now complete.
I may still return these pants. Depends how much they smell like alcohol by tmrw morning. I've already spilled once.
you took my bottle from me saying i was unprepared for its magical qualities. then you buckled it in the backseat.
Maybe I should forgo underwear.
This is a family BBQ no?
I just discovered I can sober up while teaching class
Well THAT'S the last time I buy beer and baby wipes in the same Walmart run ... just wanted to shout I USE THEM TO REMOVE MY MAKEUP, YOU ASSHOLES
My teacher just let our class out 30 minutes early, its a 50 minute class. He said the only thing we had to do was get fucked up tonight and have stories about it on Monday.
Are you doing trivia tonite? Also sorry I peed on you.
If I had a vagina, my apartment would have been the Atlantic
Well let me fuck you while I make potatoes. It's every girls dream
I’M PUT OFF FROM FOOD RN BC EARLIER I GOT SOME WATER AND I WAS 4 SIPS IN WHEN I NOticed A FUCKING BURGER KING F R Y IN MY D R I N K
um care to explain the stolen chinchila under greg's bed..i'd be fine with it if it wasnt chewing up the stash
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