i thought i was pinching her nipple. It was her mole
Dude just fell down the stars trying to leave class early, the prof just looks down at him and says"thats what you get"
On my arm I have 12 dashes, and below is written "plus 2 pretty stout whiskey drinks, so, you be the judge"
Just watched a guy pause a bluetooth convo to puke outside of esso. gotta love orangeville
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I said make yourselves at home, not to put a used condom on my ceiling fan.
I have no valid justification for peeing in your kitchen, but I don't think it's worth breaking up over.
i feel like there is just so much pressure to sex him up, its like the weight of the world is on my vagina.
That amazing moment when the girl in the passenger seat decides to strip you while your driving.
Hurry there's four guys dressed up as a bachelorette party, one has a condom veil and the rest are selling candy bouquets and asking if anyone wants to get laid for $5
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You're invited to our X-games themed party. We have an ice luge and every time someone eats shit we drink. It's gonna be great.
I don't think a gay three way is the best way to confirm your sexuality.
You dropped a beer and it was like when wilson floated away. Complete with sobbing apologies
Shit, no womder she didn't wanna fuck me
I just watched my ex butt chug a quart of eggnog. Why did I dump her again?
He described his sex dream about me using only emojis
My mom just used the chap stick I used right after giving him a blow job. I am a horrible daughter :(
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