I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
My toast was "here's to being positive, and testing negative... Cheers!"... after that chick gagged on her shot, everyone knew.... slut.
You coming out tonight? We gotta hang out before I move to Madison. BTW I'm moving to Madison.
i can't believe i brushed your teeth last night. so drunk.
We are lost. Everyone is drunk and it all went downhill after we iced the bus driver.
I took his sheets with my when I left seeing that I underestimated my period. Also grabbed a 6-pack out of the fridge because breakfast is the most important meal of the day & I don't do other peoples laundry for free.
obviously my window is still shattered. they're pressure washing my condo today. i think i need a bloody mary.
Euphemism? No, "pantsless vodka yoga" is a legitimate pastime of mine
we are still finding bottels filled with his pee. tom almost drank the one in the frig
I refuse to apologize. Any dick that comes that close to my face uninvited is gonna get bit
Dude it was bad... like you fell asleep around the toilet after drinking from the back tank bad.
we're decorating our christmas cookies with birth control. so pretty.
smoked some of that legal weed last night, felt like God himself legit bent me over his knee and spanked my ass. Never again..never.
He played Harry Potter Fan Fiction videos to get me in the mood. He might be the one.
What! I said that you would fall in love? See I know better. Dark liquor makes me think everything is a dream. I barely remember saying that
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