just realized i've hooked up with 3/4 of the guys here COOL
Yeah. I woke up naked in his bed this morning and remember saying "Get a condom cuz I can't afford an abortion right now" last night. He didn't run. He's a keeper
I would go down on you faster than GM stock
I want you to come here and listen to her climax and then tell me how funny you think it is.
I woke up tied to the door handle with reindeer patterned socks. You can tell it's Christmas.
She was surprised when she saw all our living room furniture was made from old kegs. It's like she's never met us before...
we were sitting on his couch watching tv and laughing at how funny the voices on the commercial were, then we realized the volume wasn't on.
I just tried to eat one of my ear plugs, thinking it was a cheese curl. I need it to be break RIGHT NOW.
Dear future Eric, sorry about the Everclear. Sincerely, Eric +2 shots E.C.
I drew a giraffe.. But she did say that bumped that test up from a 39 to a 40. It's the little things.
My penis needs a shock collar
BTW car sex works all the muscle groups. Just sayin. Legs/butt are sore as are arms, back and core.
Well there's only 4 people in my class, we've watched a video, the instructors encouraged us to start using cocaine and now we are on break.
It's been productive.
We kinda got asked to leave the strip club and on the way out, you fell again. When you finally got up we got a standing ovation from the girls behind the bar and you took a bow. It was awesome.
We are making a pool on how long he stays sober this time you want in?
Randomize
