Just wanted to let you know that if you need my services as a male dancer for his birthday, let me kno so I can clear my schedule
Is it weird i consider You Sexy Thing our song?
what age do we have to be before we can stop fucking guys on the first date?
he was on top of me and all of a sudden stopped and starting picking his nose...i asked him if he was okay, he sort of looked confused, and he told me he had a booger that hurt. guess its a good thing i wasnt planning on dating this guy
SO stoned. Sitting in just a thong in front of a fan. NO work for a WEEK! Life is good :)
It was like what a highfive between zeus and Jesus would sound like
He freaked out when I started to orgasm. He said he never knew girls could orgasm too.
She told me I made the cut, and to write my name and number on the white board by the door. I was the 7th number down.
Eight drinks in. Subject is fondling chips before eating them. Intoxicated texting has expanded from best friend to random guy I met in FBLA.
You told the cop you where the star of the Track team and tried to run away. So yeah, i'm not surprised.
Lol no. She's home safe. You forget she is too pretty to get arrested.
one of these days i'm gonna do a sparkly magical girl transformation into snoop dogg
but if we have a President Trump come Tuesday, I might throw myself off the Walt Whitman Bridge so Thursday might not work for me after all.
The awkward moment when you're leaving the most attractive guy you've ever been with and you're trying not to shit on yourself. Fucking welcome to my life
Please come pick up your twin. She's tap dancing in her underwear and that's not how you want yourself represented.
Randomize
