Its about making memories worth repressing
girl you didnt miss much. except me passing out for 3 hours AT JOBBIE NOONER on some random's boat. i was topless, then completely naked. heard girls were throwing ice cubes at me. i was useless. remember nothing.
she's basically destroyed all of the faith i had that skinny blond girls could be a functioning part of society.
I just saw a 3 year old try to break out of a daycare by driving a big wheel at full speed into a metal gate. Today is going to be epic.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's kind of sad that your greatest accomplishment today is that you stood up and didn't fall down.
THE MIME IS MIMING TO BUST A MOVE KARAOKE. ALL MIME-RELATED EVENTS DESERVE CAPS LOCK
We both paused during sex to do the clap during the Friends theme song. Soulmates.
I'm bringing vagina and cookies. You'll be fine.
You almost set me on fire last night.
You probably deserved it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
They're making him take his shirt off cause they think he's the bouncer. We're in his backyard.
Its ok. Im having a low day. About to mix cake mix with milk and drink it.
Apparently my face was in the trashcan and in between throw ups I was screaming LOS DIABLOS. I woke up this morning with a bird flying around my room. Nobody seems as concerned as I am.
I shaved an Xmas tree into my junk.... I placed your present underneath.
maybe i should limp back to therapy...
oh yeah will you also bring home vodka i wanna do shots on the roof
Ur creepiness is now affecting my life and I'm not okay with it
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