I had a dream last night where you were a transsexual in a low cut blue dress with lovely long brown hair. You were very pretty. I hope you are well.
My birthing hips are way to big to be around all these juveniles.
His penis is literally smaller than my cell phone. I can't go out like that.
EVERYONE CAN HEAR YOU FUCKING YOU ARE IN A TENT
Thanks for alerting everyone in our apartment what your one night stand's name is. Could you scream a little louder?
This guy punched out a light, puked in the sink, stole the mailbox, then tried to tell ME that I had to leave the party... Then his dog shit on the floor.
If you have shit your pants within the past two years, please take a seat.
He told me that his favorite part about me is hearing my voice while we fuck. I think that was the nicest thing he has EVER said to me.
You should have thought about how you were going to treat me before having me take photos of your asshole.
Well, she yelled at the stripper that she couldn't lick whipped cream off his nipples because she is lactose intolerant.
Just hooked up my fuck buddy with a job working for my dad...this can only end bad.
It turned from Netflix and chill to cringeworthy YouTube videos and chill. At least he's honest.
She has the best kind of daddy issues
What, That's like a total 7 inches of cock and 6 are from Joe. Don't be mad at me because you had the lamest orgy ever.
She super glued his penis to his testicles. And shaved off a good portion of his hair after he passed out at the party.
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