he called me a worthless slut and then went 2 the bathroom 2 pee on the floor before leavin. but he was really hot and he left his jacket, should i call him?
He tagged himself in all of my pictures so he would get a notification if someone commented on it.
Restraining orders are what college is about.
his dad told me thanks for making his little boy a man at breakfast this morning
He just did blow off my nipples. He's not serious about his girlfriend.
please bring me a paper towel asap.
I was drinking wine in bed and spilt some on my chest.. And I cautiously guided it into my belly button but now I dont know what to do.
I think I died last night. I had 14 beers..well 13 1/2 if you count the one that got spilled on the baby in the elevator.
I just heard my parents fuck. What. The. Fuck. My rooms right under theirs.. My dad barely even lasted a minute. Im almost ashamed..
I feel like I have to sign a death waver before I have sex with him...
Would be in best interest to sanitize the DVDs
If there was a build-a-penis, I would build that penis.
You fucked two dudes in the same night and still went home to your cats. How does that happen?
I put the area codes from ludacris' "area codes" into our expensive data visualization software at work, it's been a productive day
Yah. I'm gonna lay you down and feed you grapes, except I'm gonna replace grapes for my balls
when I found u, u were using a t-shirt for pants
She was blacked out at her own party. It felt good to stand next to her while she laid on the floor and say "vomit does not look good on you."
Randomize
