I thought spray tan was a myth
?
You know, something that only happens in Jersey
What would Jesus do? ... Jesus would slap a ho.
why is jon gosselin on the news 24/7 for dating some new lady?? how bout I get on msnbc for not getting laid since forever ago
she's sitting on the other side of the room at this party. with her smirnoff tucked in that little opening between her cleavage and shirt. drinking from a straw. snapping her fingers off beat.
it's love
I have taken lazynest to a new level. I took a picture of the notes on the board instead of writing them. I win.
just thinking about him makes my vagina shudder.
so are you any less fat since you started doing blow?
Well for starters, her tits were hairy.
I feel like saying your blowjobs are worth a burrito is not the best strategy to get him to be more giving in bed.
PUB CRAWL IS THE WEEK I COME BACK FROM NOLA OMG OMG OMG. Has it been a year already since I tried to make out with you and you let a bar tender take a shot out of your cleavage? Time flies.
Now in just stoned listening to my dads philosophical idea about public transit
And noooow we're smoking a ton of REALLY strong weed and THIS IS THE SOFTEST CAT EVER
Bro if you were a bird I would puke in your mouth right now
No, dude...I agree it's great in theory but I promise you that 80 drunk 21 year old sorority girls together in one room for formal is one of the worst drama filled ideas ever. Ever.
In all fairness that 65 year old man looked 23 in club lighting so you can fuck right off
Randomize
