Imagine if sharks could walk on land...scary.
Her underwear doesnt even match. If youre going to be a face book whore at least have matching shit.
He had a stripper pole in his bedroom. I didn't know whether to be impressed or creeped out.
rather than putting your name in guys phones, you just texted 90999 to donate $10 to Haiti and then gave it back to them
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
considering how much of last night I don't remember and the amount of ones laying on my desk right now, it's safe to say I'm concerned
dude, I feel like I need to get my gf's roommate a gift. something that says, sorry you walked in on me getting blown. suggestions?
I meant to thank you again for giving up a potential interracial threesome to come to my party. I'm glad you stayed!
I think you're going to have to drive me to white haven. I don't know if my brain can handle having my mom drop me off at a strip club.
He was just lying on the living room floor watching Star Wars with six empty pack of cigarettes and two empty cases of beer.
In his defence I guess I did take the bed, couch and dining room set in the breakup.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm beer bonging chocolate fondue. That's how my Valentines Day is going.
I specialize in how to hang out and party with randoms after you've hooked up with them. Not in feelings.
Theyll love you, its bunch of older ladies who drink whisky and sours and talk about the sex seans in Game of Throwns
I’m going to try to be less of a cryptic bitch this week. Should be nice.
gave out my moms phone number instead of mine last night... thattttttttttttttt dunk.
LOOK AT HOW SMOOTH THIS BITCH IS
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