his personality makes his face look like an asshole.
i'd fuck the guy who invented dead baby jokes.
he wanted to have me eat skittles off of his body. he mad gay sex even gayer.
you do realize eating doritos and gatorade as a breakfast hangover cure is only acceptable for one more month - then we have to grow up
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
giving a 30 min presentation still drunk is like giving birth, upside down in a pit of snakes while being on fire.
My mom and I were trying to explain to my sister what an uncircumcised penis looks like. We had some minor disagreements.
How do you get a 7 on a pregnancy test?
Go ahead. I tried to back up ur budhism story but she mite be catching on
Dammit. I hoped that would work. Just tell her I'm doing my pilgrmidge to Nepal or something.
Yea, you were talking about how you did not want to be a reindeer for at least 5 minutes.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Instead of getting a taxi some gay black guy drove us home. He is trying to break into the taxi business
Way to promote small business.
I just want a man to crawl into my bed with me and never crawl out. Anti socialism at his best.
Hey don't blame me, picking what flavor of condom to put on my dick is a very difficult selection process
Look at us. Planning our business meeting. Including snacks like shrooms & trail mix.
I should never have to text my best friend asking if she eloped again last night.
Bold words for someone NOT on a unicycle
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