just found his boxers balled up inside my tights, hidden in my freezer. damn i love college.
I was just on craigslist and saw and ad for a naked yoga instructor. I will no longer be jobless.
I can't tell if your life is amazing or needs reevaluation when "did I get hit with a nightstick" is a legitimate question.
there are some nice people on this island. free ride free pancakes and they even prayed for us when they dropped us off
The vagina on Hilton Head is mighty fine this time of year.
I will not hesitate to go down on a dick for some cream soda.
Jared is "trying to bite a strangers hat off" drunk. Oh, and that stranger is a girl at a table of 5 guys, one girl.
BEST FEELING EVER: Standing in a hot fucking shower, while super baked, while eating a cookie.
You eat cookies in the shower?
I have no idea. I think this is what happens when people take drugs in the middle of the day
ahhhh just came to creep and you're not there AND your thong you were wearing last night is on the floor..someone has some explaining to do
Drunk me spoon fed everyone baby food last night.
Well you were hungry, by then you cried and called yourself a basic bitch for eating crackers
I feel worse lying to the guy I hooked up with than I actually do for cheating on my bf
...and now I welcome the sweet embrace of death.
Did I tell you I drunk fucked my one roommate last week
Uh no
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