i wonder how he feels talking to my mother about jesus with a condom on his dick
Was it a mistake telling him I couldn't get the abortion until I was 2 months along on the first date?
She walked in the room and sighed really loudly fishing for attention. but I didn't bite cuz I don't give a fuck what's wrong with her.
Well i just learned hong kong is a country...thank you olympics
ride him like a prized pony all the way to orgasm town.
You said you were going to take the sideview mirror to your own car so that nobody would steal it. Thats why you woke up with it.
No, the weekend was great. It was the waking up in the pond in the raft without an oar that sucked. That fucking water is cold at 7am.
Beer vodka and pink lemonade powder mixed together. So. Many. Penises. My vagina will be calling out to them tonight. Coooooooooooooome.
Its okay I walked into your house, searched for my wallet in your purse, and took a shot of Tequilia all without eye contact, right?
Note to self: Do not bring gift bag with cock ring inside to family Christmas. Leave to unwrap at home.
Yea I saw a friend of yours carrying your limp body somewhere
I don't know how I'm going to know it's her, I only know what she looks like with a wig on
SHE COULD ALREADY BE HERE AND I WOULDN'T EVEN KNOW
I just want some dick and chicken fingers please advise
just give up on your dreams and come get shit house drunk with me.
Currently looking up Winnie-the-Pooh porn.
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