make sure i look cute passed out on the couch.
so i am drinking whiskey and watching home alone 2 by myself. it turns out moving to a foreign country isn't all that different after all.
I woke up next to her this morning and couldn't remember her name. Luckily, she had written it on my hand so that I could add her on facebook.
The good news is the bleeding stopped. I think I'm going to sober up before I tell you the bad news though.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Uggh answer your phone, you are the only one I know who'll be proud of what I woke up next to this morning .
Omg just remembered. I tried to kidnap a dog.
I'm so glad I got to use the word gutterslut before 11:00a today.
We hooked up. It felt slightly wrong considering he is my foreign exchange student but there's a reason America imports. Foreigners got the goods.
.It's like gods test of willpower against vaginal comfort
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well he has a golden retriever set as his background so there's no way he was filming us having sex
Also lets pinky promise right now that we will NOT play "Pony" outside of each other's rooms if we have a hook up over
Its my nipple ring piercing anniversary. We need to celebrate.
at this point I think you're judging my taste in men
I swear I'm not
It's okay, I'm judging my taste in men
I went to finger her and found a penny. I think ill keep it.
Mass text: You have all failed me. How have the people I loved so much let me go so long in life without ever eating a McRib sandwich?!
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