i think guys who wear condoms are gentleman.
Yea i traded my bed for half a bag of jimmy johns jalepno chips, am I proud of it no, Am I happy I did it? yes
i dont need a football game to get drunk and yell at my tv
My ex was here I looked him in the eyes when I grabbed some other guy by his belt and dragged him to a room
My Mom printed off all of my Augusts text messages. Apparently I've been drinking WAY too much and having an intermediate drug problem. I have to go home everyw weekend for the rest of the semester
You could breast feed yourself wine!! This shit is genius!
My ex just sent me a message asking if she could blow me, but only if we get caught by her new bf. If she promises to swallow I'm doing it.
how much ball-pain constitutes an emergency?
Also, they sell weed-chocolate covered strawberries. For the romantic stoner.
That was one of the best texts I got today
I haven't had to masterbate since I started dating him over a year ago. I don't even know if I remember how and my vagina is calling.
Give me a minute. I'm trying to buy moonshine from a railroad worker named "Cowboy."
She'll feel so accomplished if she finally gets to bang me.
Basically I think I'm replacing men/sex with theme parks.
Sooo i'm debating posing nude for the drawing and painting classes, I just wanna see if they draw my nip ring.
you started putting peanut butter on your pubes.
Randomize
