Yes because finding a guy to give head to is pretty difficult.
I mean not really
Obviously that's why it was a joke you are so stupid it's impossible.
If I had a nickel for every time somebody called me a bad person I would have enough money to check into rehab
a kid in a transformers shirt tried to pick me up last night at work. he also rolled up on a bicycle, the kind with pedals. do i look that easy?
you go from almost hooking up with the hottest guy at the party, to going home with your ex....how is that even mathematically possible
Oh so it was one of those "I shouldn't have gotten in a cab with a random 21 year old girl" kinda nights.
I can feel my moral fiber fraying.
Do you think it's illegal to work at a bar if you're on probation for a DUI? I need a night job where I can meet men.
My neighbour is taking her hamster for a walk on a leash. Come over now
You guys bombarded us in the bathroom and that kid whipped his dick out and peed in the sink.
Buying her a drink is like giving a seagull a French fry, all you're gonna do is get annoyed and shit on
Dude are you being arrested? I swear I just saw you laying on the hood of your car with a cop patting you down...
It's hot as dicks out. Lets get drunk on the roof and make pterodactyl sounds at people.
So I'm already mostly naked in a kind of bed but obviously too lazy to take my boots off. It's like January 1st is already here
I just compared my relationship to that double ended dong scene from Requiem. This day just took a turn.
I’m gonna stop you right there. The last time you had a “brilliant” idea, I woke up to my kitchen covered in flour and a javelin through my tv.
Randomize
