I didn't know that people actually queef. Is this a real thing?
I believe so, yes.
Would you be offended if I asked if it has happened to you?
I know i'm drunk when the "men" sign on the bathroom sounds chinese
a kid in a transformers shirt tried to pick me up last night at work. he also rolled up on a bicycle, the kind with pedals. do i look that easy?
I just saw a girl walking up the hill with a little red wagon full of booze... I want to be in her study group.
im hiding in a corner. drunk. with a plate of stolen jello shots. im pretty sure people are looking for me or the jello shots.
Nothing says happy baby shower like showing up still kinda drunk from last night with an open tall boy in one hand and fries in the other.
I woke up at 5:47 in the morning to you peeing on my parents bedroom floor. I think we've established that you have a limit .
Your argument isn't valid... just because I test the waters doesn't make me gay. Makes me versatile. And who doesn't love that!
All i remember his him yelling yahtzee while pouring beer down her shirt .
You made me drive your car so you could give the dude from the parking lot a BJ in the back seat. Classy.
Was so close to hoppin on it but then I realize it's not a dick and I needed to keep walking. Primal instincts.
What the hell man, you basically stole my girlfriend with a bucket of KFC.
Ok thats great. so just to recap: you fucked a billionare in his penthouse last night, and I had a glass of wine on the toilet.
Well. I think my red tank top is jinxed. this is now the second time it's gotten jizz on it.
I call bullshit
Call it what ever you want I just need to figure out how to get permanent marker off my cock
Randomize
