I just learned that your liver regrows itself every 2 months. Best news I've heard all week.
This frat boy drinking a forty and wearing a pussy patrol shirt just ran out in front of my car. I should have used less brakes.
So my game is weak??
If your game is "Lets have sex, and maybe pizza" then yes.
We drove past his house blaring "Like a virgin" in the middle of the day. pretty sure he heard.
today's the one month anniversary of me not giving anyone head. can you tell me you're proud
it's sad that this is a milestone
I know now the amount of smoke it takes to set off the fire alarm....no longer worried about using the bong...not even close
the tv said "its small, its comfortable..." and i started laughing... safe to say he lost any dignity he had left...
I just wanna be like "dude your gf's on a porn site" but i just dont know if i have the heart.
Actually, I take that back. You can only have it if I'm allowed to French braid the mullet.
Oh, and one of the worst parts... his name was Mario. I fucked a Nintendo character.
i spent 45 minutes yellng Heather I feel so bad i wanna die and then 45 more yelling I DONT WANNT TO DIE. thats how drunk i was
We were having margaritas and I was saying "back when I was drinking..." They looked all confused. Then I realized "holy shit they think THIS is drinking?"
he told me I was hypnotizing him with my mouth so I guess I do give good head
Right after i got done cumming i sat back and gave a big Ric Flair "WOOOOOO!"
Remember how I was complaining about how no guy has ever gotten me off?
Randomize