as for my dating sex life, no more regret sticks. Only pride wands from now on.
I woke up with a picture of my dick as my background. still wondering if it was a good night or not.
I think I'm cybering, it's been a while and its more in depth than it was in 8Th grade.
the beat of "birthday sex" is shockingly similar to my dry heaving rhythm. it's making me nauseous all over again.
I saw the video from Saturday. So, how much did I drink for me to think I was a duck and strip my clothes?
I remember sitting there at the toilet, bleeding everywhere and thinking, "I walked from my bedroom to here. What happened?"
You just said we could build a blanket and pillow "fuck fort." Of course I'm never leaving you.
Where the hell did all of these gingers come from? It's like they crawled out of their shame-caves for st Patrick's day.
Can we talk about how i am holding a tupperware container of my own puke in the back of my grandparents car while my sister drives
Rule 1: If any of us dies on a trip, the other two have to 'Weekend at Bernies' the shit outta that corpse...
She's lucky her pussy is worth listening to her ramble about bedroom furniture for 30 minutes
I'm going to write a new song and call it "Did I wax my vagina for this?" remind me to never go across the country for a penis ever again.
He told me he wished he could shrink down to a small size so he could live inside my cleavage
I say this out of love and friendship. Eat ice cream not the d.
Is it bad if I look at someone i dont know and just want to punch them in the face?
Randomize
