Ugh now I'll have to carry around an overnight bag to all the bars I visit tonight. but hey! maybe I'll meet a dude! And need it!
Life lesson: using the oven as a heater= $500 electric bill
hapi new year, hope this year brings u happiness and lots of sexi people ;)
stop writing like that.
I dont even clean my room anymore .. i drunk proof it for when i come back smashed with a guy
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Were driving two hours to st louis so we can pee on the arch. See you in the morning. I might be sober by then.
Did I show you my penis last night?
you act like breakfast cereal isnt an entirely appropriate chaser
Also, I don't remember opening my gifts from my family. It was cool when I woke up with a new ihome.
as soon as I stop standing here with one leg up on my bathroom counter admiring my balls, I'm going to go tan. and then you may come over.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We won 11 games of beer pong, and then I spent a half hour trying to get into the top bunk. Then i realized it was a cabinet in the bathroom
I want your cock.
All we are is dust in the wiiiiiiinnnnnnnnnnd
he said didn't have much sexual experience and then proceeded to tell me he is going to make me cum harder than my vibrator could
well, that escalated quicky
I think I'd rather see her get hit by a car in one of those Russian dash cam videos on YouTube.
I tried to get the guy I like to “spit shake” on a sexual bet... why am I such a bro fml
I don't wanna SLEEP with him, I want to start bar fights with him. There's a difference.
Randomize