This random guy asked me if I had downs. I was like up yours! And I got out of his car.
Don't use my boy Weezy to support your whoreish tendencies.
i said send nudes i get bra and panties. thats not what i fucking asked for.
I just smelled my beer. It smells like coming home.
my breakfast just consisted of gushers (made with real fruit!) and they're trying to tell me im not eating right?
Whenever someone from high school gets pregnant or has a pregnancy scare my self esteem grows a good 5 points
mom and dad are leaving for florida on 4/20, this is a sign
Should I feel bad that I fucked her and made her ride my little brothers razor scooter home?
Hooking up with him would mean my type has officially become... drug dealer.
I walked into your room and you had fallen asleep smoking a cigarette. You just had the butt in your mouth with ash all over your face.
Am I supposed to confront my 52-year-old boss/mother of 3 about the fact that we matched on Tinder?
I don't even have his number. I have his pants tho
Visions of polite missionary are dancing in my head right now kinda and it alarms me
The convent might be a nice break from real life
i told someone my fallback plan was to be a slutty bartender and i needed the practice as i straddled them to pour a shot
Randomize
