Megan Fox is the only woman I would let pee on me.
I'm similar. She's the only woman I'd ask to pee on me.
Ok yeah you're right. I'd ASK Megan Fox to pee on me. I'd ALLOW Erin Andrews to pee on me if she asked.
So, it's like build-a-bear for your vag?
Never drink rum straight from the bottle, even if people say it'll make you a pirate. It won't: it'll make you a bumbling shitfaced idiot who just drank rum straight from the bottle.
He thanked me for being "his little blond pogo stick last night". Good thing?
how are pickles made is in the google history again... why do you always wonder that, and forget the answer?
I made friends with a raccoon. I pet it. Like I was Pocahontas.
Is it cum slut, cumslut or cum-slut? Sexting, plz advise ASAP
you vomited through the snorkel and onto the back of your head. it was truly amazing
My halloween constume SCREAMS "Hey i just got done with a shitty relationship and I'm DTF"
It's official, the cities waste management does not recycle porn.
Between my vag yelling at me for having bad sex and my legs yelling at me for going to the gym I cant hear myself think.
At least his std test came back clean, gotta look at the positives here
I’ll always remember that day you sent me that random nude on accident lmao changed my life
He climbed on the counter and announced it was time for something called The Cocktacular and all the girls immediately left. He cockblocked the entire fraternity!
She demanded to see my stimulus package, I had to go over.
Randomize
