The boys are giving me the exam answers and I don't even have to expose my body..yayy engineering!
we gave some random guy a shot for shoveling our sidewalk.
im the poster child for why you shouldnt play beer pong with wine.
We had sex in the bathroom. Then he told me I could watch him pee.
I mean, once you help another girl drunker than you zip her jeans you can't help but be friends after that
She just hopped out of the car at a red light to pet the baby Jesus in the nativity scene.
Not worth it.
They didn't have a "sorry I was late for your birthday party because I was getting arrested" card.
A toast to whoever set this year's daylight savings fallback to the day after halloween, granting us another hour to detox before we pretend to be functional adults. Clearly, a partier with forethought and clear priorities. Cheers!
this is a PSA to never have sex in a bed from ikea
He had a hook in his ceiling. I think I'm in love!
It was a fun night. I made out with the door guy at the gay bar but he didn't speak english
There was no door guy at the bar
You ruined the universe
You left me with 12 red bulls and a bottle of vodka. What did you expect?
He asked the waiter, at 6:40 am, drunk, if they served alcohol. After he said no, he's like 'well, I guess we can eat then.'
I ate cake in bed. Felt great
Randomize
