Asian hipster sighting. About to tackle him and ask him to take me to chinatown
Can't remember why I called but it definitely had something to do with Lou Bega
its simple. when his lips are on my clitoris i want to marry him. when they are speaking i want to kill him.
I just found out my boyfriend is cheating on me, please tell me Carl is a unisex name.
we may have ended up at a gay bar on accident. we're gonna work this to get free drinks.
Hurricane Sex Time is the only thing iv said since it started.
I have a surprise for you
Is it drugs? I want drugs. Or a puppy!
I woke up last night a kitchen floor with my shirt off and I love America written on my leg in eye liner
the day has come. I have finally reached the point in my life where I just don't give a fuck about anything anymore. it's beautiful!
I just realized I haven't got laid since the last time the Browns won.
Is this like a preordered booty call?
I'm just going to ride dicks all the way to the to the gates of hell
Hold me and let me compliment your butt
You ruined the universe
The bartender remember my drink from last sat. I think we just became drocals...drunk. locals.
Randomize
