We better get laid next semester cause I prayed hard
I even walked 30 feet with my eyes closed from two love rocks so that we get some cock
there is this woman at the counter who looks identical to linda ellerbee. and she's grinning. COME. INSIDE. NOW.
Brandy, I need a picture of your boobs. Not time to explain.
Stuck in the Dallas airport. At the bar. Everytime a flight to DC gets cancelled, I'm takin a shot. Fuck you snow.
i lost virginity while listening to candy shop. something in my life has finally gone right.
she just took adderol and chased it w dog water
so does the 200 for rent and 150 for utilities include the never telling my boyfriend about the guys i bring home.. or is that extra?
I officially became the girl who let a guy get her off under the covers last night while her roommate and a friend were there. He was impressed by my ability to stay quiet and stay relatively focused on the conversation...
I am so ashamed of you, and yet so proud.
I would sacrifice a finger for two more hours of sleep.
I dunno, there's just something so\ncomforting about having his penis in my mouth.
Accidentally searched up "pizza pasties" instead of "pizza pastries". I was not disappointed.
You know you've made it in life when the people in the next stall are cheering on your orgasm
I'm still not sure how to feel about the fact that we had a threesome with a guy the same age as my dad
Is it wrong for me to wish my cat had arms to get me a beer?
I’m going to fail his daughter so she stays in my class and I can keep fucking him. BEST. ORGASMS. EVER.
Then you can teach the kid to be a home wrecker
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