I feel like if im whacking off more now that i have a gf than i did when i was single, somethings wrong.
Sometimes, when I pour the powdered creamer in my coffee I like to pretend it's Colombian grade cocaine.
That's the kind of morning coffee a girl could welcome the day with.
The new Black Eyed Peas song is the stupidest shit I've heard since the last Black Eyed Peas song.
My vagina supports interfraternal relations
id say bad/good trip...at first I wanted to claw off my skin... but then when i tried i ended up tickling myself for an hour.
She liked to slap me in the face while she was on top. All I can say is that big boobs can excuse a lot.
Oh and I'm kind of in the library.
Waiting for the foreign guy who keeps staring to make his creepy move.
so i might have figured out why that girl isn't talking to me...I'm 90% confident I didn't give her a pillow when she stayed over >.>
Legitimately sent a work email with "Hey, you kids, get off my lawn" as the subject line.
I fucked him on my yoga mat. Then we wake and baked and ate granola. So yes, you could say I found my center.
he just fluffed my hair and told me I had to dance with him because we were both gingers.
Fly, little bird! Repopulate the ginger race!
He also needs to focus on not being such a little bitch, but that's none of my business.
I had sex in the bed of a guy who owns a house last night so I feel like this is a significant step up from car sex in the parking lot of a library
U wanna come over and watch talidaga nights. Ill make pancakes
What? It's 130 in the morning.
Aww come on i make bomb ass pancakes
i asked her if she was sure that she was ready to do it and she replied with "come at me bro"
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