8th day he invented the big mac, 9th he invented pop rocks, 10th day boobs.
We should be called the Road Head Warriors
just found my diary from when i was 14. i demand a drinking game of this.
I miss vodka workout Fridays
but then i turned into a human whiteboard because i thought it was a good idea to bring out markers
He was banging holes in the kitchen wall with pots. They tried to pull him away but only managed to pants him. He kept "drumming".
Before attempting to fly away into the night you asked me to take care of your sister. I agreed.
You can buy vodka at target here.. Maybe Missouri isn't so bad after all
The water at the venue tasted HORRIBLE so I just kept drinking booze. It was like the medievals.
Started crying to "that's the way it is" by celine. What the fuck uterus?!
I'm fine with our borderline lesbian behavior.
We left him in some bushes a few blocks down toward campus. Did he find his way home?
Perfect. I'll put on my party clothes and write emergency numbers on my arm
I woke up spooning with two strangers on Saturday morning... I felt like a sexual sandwich
I used to shoot steroids in my ass but for a totally different reason
Randomize
