I just drove by a church. On the sign out front was written 'crocodile cock'. On both sides.
just turned my empty handle of passion fruit smirnoff into a fish bowl. I love college.
so he came in me this morning and i was like WTF DUDE. i called him Daddy until he agreed to pay the full $40 for plan B. He wants to name our Patrick because it will be a st pattys day baby. absolutely NOT.
My financial aid advisors would be so pissed if they knew I was spending my loan money on strippers
I'm cooking a can of baked beans on the baseboard heater. It is too early in the semester to be this poor.
I'm drinking carlo rossi straight from the jug. I don't have any clean cups...how am I still at this point in my life...
I took my shirt off and stood in the kitchen for an hour and a half talking to his parents about my tattoos
sorry can't make it tonight, greg's getting back from italy. he's had two weeks of carbs and no gym; now's my chance to get myself a piece of that newly-fat, low self-esteemed ass.
Long story short, the rash from your last birthday party told me not to go to this one.
Ughhh I can't remember the last time "time fell back or springed forward" and I wasn't at the bar to argue about it :(
I'm still alive btw, in case you were worried about my well being.
he kissed both of us goodnight when we dropped him off...I didn't know if I was more offended or impressed
Its amazing how creative youll get when your house has been out of toilet paper for a week and a half
we've dated a week and made out twice. he is taking it slow. but his body is stupid sexy. just want him to stop respecting me and fuck me like a gutter slut. respect me later im not getting younger.
If by whore you mean UPGRADE....then yes I am
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