Until he has ordered mozzarella sticks & beers at 2pm while wearing formal attire, then this is still my bar.
He's been grabbing my ass as a greeting since 2004, sex was overdue
she chased the tour bus screaming I BET YOUR DICK IS THE SIZE OF YOUR MICROPHONE STAND. i think its safe to say were never getting vip passes again.
That would explain his violent outburst while watching barefoot contessa...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he told me he was watching a movie and he'd be over later and i asked how long. he said 8 inches give or take. you cease to amaze me with the guys you set me up with.
I would never do this in real life. It's only college.
You pretty much isn't said it
Those words don't go together.
I tried to force my roommate into a sink last night. And I almost won.
Do you think I'm short enough to dress up in a ghost costume and go trick or treating and have people believe that I'm actually a child?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm sorry but the visual image of you suffocating on vagina is basically hysterical
Drunk Sam makes promises that Sober Sam can't keep
When Pitbull's songs sum up your life... you know it's time for some serious life changes.
Why are you barefoot at a strip club?
I am certain that you would be a mere freckle on the behemoth of slutty that has taken place at this complex.
I just sent a Slack that autocorrected tomorrow to gonorrhoea. Please note that Slack autocorrect isn’t very good.
Randomize