Cops are here now. U need to come back. Ur not under arrest. But u need to apologize to the woman for what you did to her cat.
DOES ANYONE KNOW THE NINJA TURTLES
Just because i have a masturbation problem doesnt mean you can put 20 photos of Jesus in my room.
Woke up wearing just a scarf, the holidays are definetly here
Dudeeeee, i ordered strippers for my party.
I ordered a moonbounce.
Fuck, you win.
If someone cleans their bathroom and shaves their crotch for you you kinda have to admit the relationship to facebook
malibu coconut giveth, and malibu coconut taketh away
So I love how we keep introducing our friends to sex toys. It's like pay it forward vibrator edition.
He fucked me so hard I might have to go to the hospital for internal bleeding
Can I have him when you're done?
So, we estimated there is at least 40 pounds of boob in our house.
We tried the hang n bang, remember? You ruined it by crying and telling me you loved me while blowing me.
As soon as he came we went to Dairy Queen. That drive through lady was very condescending about our "just fucked" ice cream.
Just traded a sandwich for anxiety drugs outside the club. I fuckin' LOVE this place.
Her hookup left his underwear and shorts in the dorm last night... What he was wearing when he left, we may never know.
UPDATE: IM NOT A TEEN MOM LETS GO PARTY
Randomize
