Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
you're the one who masterbates every night to the titanic soundtrack
if tampons were more like dildos the world would be a better place
she just came into my room, drunkenly shoved six dollars into my bra and told me to spend it on chicken wings.
So I totally just remembered that you tried to smoke a hornet out of it's nest.
my mouth is as dry as a post-menopausal camel on antidepressant's vagina.
I'm sitting at home, day drinking, while watching crossroads with brittany spears. I'm not the person you should be asking for advice right now.
Uh yeah. I ate a brick of cheese. Didn't even cut it. We were admiring the teeth marks I was leaving. We decided it was the negative of my mouth
Sweet. I'm actually coaching my work study into a 4-girl orgy so dinner was kinda important. Yes, I'm the best boss ever.
Its okay, i dont mind you drinking, im just surrounded by it, there is some random dude laying on your couch with a bucket that ive never seen before
The whole movie was ruined when some chick started laughing with what you could tell was QUITE the mouthful. This of course made the guy laugh harder.
Watching the wiggles while tripping on acid is the scariest fucking thing of all time
Tequila Tuesday.. tonight is the night I defeat the liquor.
I have class at 8:30 and I am not bailing you out of the drunk tank again.
I'm gonna chug this bud light an might injure this high school penis, like I'm 17 again
Validation I posted a good pic? The lonely fuckboys send out the booty call signal. Of course I answered the call; Gotham needs its hero.
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