i nerd-gasmd. plain and simple.
The hot Japanese girl in my class just said her "favorite sexy American actor is Nick Cage." That, I can work with.
He asked me If i had cheated on my boyfriend when I said no he said it's like he doesnt know me anymore
FOUR LOKO IS YES. SUNDAY MORNING DRUNK IS YES.
and then he proceeded to take what he called, a whip cream shower.
dizzyuy bat. 3.453 lkos. hoit sx, now im single. blackouteed
Apparently she came home completely covered in mud, pretending to be a bird...and she still had more sex than any of us this weekend.
Can you explain to me later why there's a pirate hat in my bathtub
Literally lying on a futon being hand fed bacon
Fuck you.
She told me to pick her up in the corner of shame and self-disgust.
It's not that I even wanna fuck these guys anymore, just cuddle that's all. My conscience has never been so proud.
drinks after work?
that question mark offends me.
The highlight of the night was definitely when you starting telling ppl you could shapeshift and "proved" that by stripping.
I did a trust fall off the bar and then almost got into a knife fight over a push up competition. Just another Tuesday.
Girl... I just woke up with a bloody mary in a to go cup on my nightstand and two hours late for work.. I'm sorry i can't go out on weekdays anymore. Luckily my boss was just happy i was ok
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