I may be a little high but I'm pretty sure my alphabet soup has only Os in it
We call that spaghetti Os
She STILL went home with me even when I said yes when she asked if I had an infectious disease. Turns out she asked if I had an infectious spirit...well she has my infectious spirit now
she was a 2....and a legitimate 2. like, helen keller is a 1, this girl...2.
All I remember from last night is puking up a box of cheeze-its and the building catching on fire.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you need to leave class get on facebook and start untagging IMMEDIATELY
I have eleven tally marks and an infinity sign drawn on my wrist in permanent marker. Senior bar crawl stole my liver.
Woke up un the hot tuv. Climbed out fo the hot tub and fell asleeo. Woke ip again in the hot tub.
Worst case scenario, I put a giant cork in your vagina so you don't give birth before my birthday
I Pavlov-trained him by smacking him in the nuts anytime I caught him looking at another girl in public. To this day, he's afraid to break eye contact with me in a restaurant if a tall busty blonde walks in.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The worst part about living in a small town is partying with your pharmacist and then having to buy Plan B from him the next morning.
Had to sacrifice my vibrator batteries to the thermostat gods. I had a dirty dream and also almost a heat stroke.
Crying in Target on a display sofa is normal, right? Asking for a friend.
And somehow i feel like your expectations will turn out to be illegal in some way.
Woke up to I'm AWESOME written in purple crayon all over my walls. I love drunk me
like honestly, the vodka had to go somewhere, and your moms soap dispenser just seemed right at the time..
Randomize