I used a bag of wine as a pillow last night.
the girls on my floor started fighting over who got to keep the random hoodies that boys forgot in my room after sex
But I thought everyone had breakup sex?
someone left their shoes, a resume, and a pizza in the shower... i am actually speechless
her idea of "friends with benefits" is her doing my laundry. i'm cool with it.
i was just offered a 40 day sex challenge. prepare for the best 40 days of your life.
oh. my. god. yes.
It's like, "you literally have no idea who i am but i definitely slept with your brother in your bed."
Want to do me the honour of waxing my legs again before I go to Mexico? I feel like it's a tradition we shouldn't break.
I'm up in my room and I just saw a naked guy sprint out into the streets from my mom's party downstairs
After tacos, we're chasing women.
My potted cactus died. I am literally less nurturing than the desert.
*goes to show prof a picture* *forgets tit pic is in camera roll*
We never leave a bad bitch behind. its a party foul..we'll find you somehow
You took the glass microwave plate and said it was the closest thing to a frisbee, let me know how that works out for you
I love how we can bond over the fact that we're the only ones who think the guy I drunk hooked up with looks like Voldemort
Randomize
