3.50 mugs at the bar.
Nah man, im with an ugly chick. Im waiting til everyone's drunk enough tonight, they don't notice.
How ugly, and does she have friends?
i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
Exactly. All of us sinners go to hell and get nothing while all of the goody two shoes get to go to heaven where its all pink floyd, lasers, and pot.
still haven't packed clothes. only wine. gotta love spring break
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
this kid just offered me adderall in exchange for my meal points. college at its finest
i can barely afford taco bell don't think a baby is in the budget
Ok lesson learned. Don't lick the spoon when making mushroom chocolates. The kitchen walls are melting.
He looked down at his phone and screamed "I'M NOT A DAD!" and then bought the entire bar a round
I'm hungover in the park, and some guy just handed me a business card for his church. I can feel Jesus' disapproval running through my fingertips
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i was like his sober eyes girls would come up to us, show us theirs and if approved by me blew him, if rejected they went to my truck with a bottle of patron
A girl at the bar is wearing green body paint instead of a shirt. Where are you?!
Next time you see his dad you should let him know you are now Eskimo brothers.
It took me an hour to walk from my drive way to my front door... what the fuck was in that weed?
She started crying, nearly punched a guy, started smoking multiple cigarets backwards and broke the slide on her bong. Why do I always end up babysitting the crazy ones?
Just peed on the front lawn of the capital building. Great American.
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