Its the Friday before break. There are 20 kids in my 300 person lecture hall. All with the same what the fuck am I doing here look on there face.
I'm stoned and have been watching so many cartoons that I changed the channel and real people were on, and it scared me
If I banged a coworker last night but didn't enjoy it can I put it down on my timesheet?
Yeah getting kicked out of the bar at 1 pm really set the tone for the day.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Look on the bright side. Now you know the number for poison control.
just found a someones bra in what seems to be a mix of pickle juice and vodka in my fridge. Who was over here lately?
We were pulling the glow sticks off of him and he just kept yelling, "my bones! You're taking my bones!" and asking me if I was on the crew team
Nobody wants to date "Eats Taco Bell Secretly In Her Car" Girl
He was more upset that I got into his phone than about getting caught cheating.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm sexting at my family's 4th of July BBQ and I feel no shame....
VIVE LA RESISTANCE
Oh god, what now?
I left him naked in his bed. I did cover his junk with a blanket in case his roommate walked in later though. so I don't feel as bad about it.
If he wants a future he'd best figure out the calendar function on his phone. If he can invite you to his penis he can invite you to his google cal.
GOD DAMN IT I COULD HAVE HAD A MOTHERFUCKING 3 WAY LAST NIGHT. WHY BOOZE, WHY?!
If I have put a neon “vacancy” sign on my skirt for him to get the picture I will.
Randomize