But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
It was at that point the crowd that gathered realized i wasn't getting arrested, and passed the sobriety tests. I got a standing ovation from 25 strangers
i just walked outside for a cigarette and three men walked by in glitter heels and gold shiny thongs. god i love chicago
She wants out first dance to be to 98 degrees i do cherish you...remember how i said we didn't need open bar....
Is there anything medically wrong with drinking beer from a vagina?
How did the beer even get there in the first place?
That's not what's important right now
I just smoked my last bit of kief with a grill lighter. This is what crackheads must feel like.
he just voluntarily told me he was uncircumsized.. and that his favorite color was blue.
whats our policy on dating high schoolers?
we dont have a policy but im pretty sure the state of michigan does
Dude are you being arrested? I swear I just saw you laying on the hood of your car with a cop patting you down...
Rule #36, branched off rule 4: Dave stays on a leash in crazy settings. It keeps him good and gets you laid.
So essentially he's like a puppy you can bring to a bar? Retractable leash or chain then?
I could tell you were slightly drunk by the time you started having a conversation with my tiki torch
Also not to brag but I got high last night and got us a host family in a chateau in the south of France
HE LITERALLY JUST PEED IN MY ROOM IDK WHAT TO DO HELP
I feel you. I woke up butt naked on top of my sheets with a plate of cheese next to my bed...
Please stop calling me a pterodactyl during sex. It only happens when you're drunk, but still.
Randomize
