What was that guy's name that you dated that wore the leotard?
When you come back do you think I could print anorexic pictures of Mary-Kate?
if i remember New Year's Eve then there is something seriously wrong.
I just sold my mom a dimebag. Should I feel scared or sucessful?
Just interrupted a freshman tour to ask where the sexual health center is. Figured I'd just give us all what we were really looking for.
Swallowing. Like you said. Lions. Always.
In the memo line of the check she wrote sexual healing.
He probably has his cowboy hat on, that's his house hat.
She called all of my friends to find out where I was last night. 7 out of ten said their place.
I don't deserve a penis
Get you some cowboy.
In that sentence you are the cowboy. That is not saying you should get a cowboy for yourself.
you said you couldn't hang because you had to masturbate and feed your lizard
i'm really sorry, but i'm just not sober enough to make good decisions.
A lady played my boobs as if they were drums. It's been that kinda night.
Apologies that our conversations always turn to butt sex or penis size. I thought we out grew that in our 20's.
Randomize
